Apparently, I put this blog up a year ago, posted nothing, and completely forgot about it–when I tried to set up a wordpress as “simonmermelstein”, it told me that name was already taken. I had to make sure it wasn’t Simon Mermelstein the dentist in Costa Rica (my nemesis), but sure enough, it said “Simon Mermelstein: Poetry with Velocity”, which is exactly the sort of thing I would have written about a year ago.
From henceforth, therefore, let this be the official internet presence of Simon Mermelstein the poet, in Ann Arbor, and not of Simon Mermelstein the dentist, although I’m sure he’s a lovely guy making a comfortable living. So let this poetry be laughing gas. Let it help improve your smile. Let it bust out crazy-ass tools from time to time that go reee! reee! reee! and use suction and ultraviolet light. Let it make your face numb; let it grind you to the bone. May you spit blood and drink water and think, “God, I needed that!” May you come back every six months for a cleaning. May we use these x-ray powers for good.